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20 June 2011 @ 01:31 am
We go, they go...  
I quit my job. I QUIT MY JOB. I QUIT MY JOB!

I've been unemployed for a few days now. B and I celebrated my unemployment with some midnight shenanigans like the old days when we would do nothing all summer and sleep in til noon. It's really awesome and scary in it's uncertainty. I'm kind of freaking out, but I feel really good about it... then I remember that I'm unemployed and directionless in every aspect of my life. And then I get really anxious and curl up into a ball determined to do nothing about anything.

When it came down to common sense; I just wasn't happy there. I enjoyed immensely working with a small handful of people who were genuine, funny people, but the underlying dysfunction and grossness of other people was just something I couldn't keep up with. Also, I wore a uniform and smelled like popcorn so that had to stop. Oh, did I mention I wasn't happy there? I just wasn't. That last six months of working there were probably the worst/best times of my life (more the former than the latter-89% self loathing). And toward the three month mark, I was going home in fits of anxiety.

So I quit... with no other job prospect to cradle me when I made that metaphoric descent into some other metaphoric reference to something else.

I'm going to try to look around for something else to get me through the next couple of months in the menial job market though. I cracked my tooth and I need some dentistry and I still have some fees leftover from last semester that need to be paid off before becoming too seriously serious. I know quitting was probably a reckless thing to do with all my small debts and needs still lingering about, but in a mental health conscious way of life, it provided me a chance to re evaluate and breath.

Oh, another thing, my friend was married this weekend and it was beautiful. I got some sun! I got to look pretty! I was hanging out with old friends! And I lost another friend to marriage life! So yes to growing up! :-/

PS. It's been five months since turning into a twentysomething/almost college dropout.
♫: Grizzly Bear- Ready, Able